Tweets of the Week: SimCity

Apparently SimCity, a traditionally single-player game, had some difficulties with its transition to the cloud. Who’d have thunk it? Well, anyone that was paying attention, really. It’s the game that makes you wish you picked up Tomb Raider instead!

@theleast says: I wonder how much grief Maxis/EA could have avoided if they’d simply titled it SimCity Online instead of just SimCity.
I say: That is an excellent point. I’ve read a lot of discussion as to whether this new SimCity was ever intended to be a single-player game. If it wasn’t, and all this outrage is really just due to piss poor communication with the player base on the part of EA and Maxis, well…somebody in marketing’s about to get canned.

@MikeDrucker says: When I was a kid, SimCity being “always on” just meant that we left it overnight to see what would happen.
I say: When I was a kid, “the cloud” was that asshole who threw spiky turtles at Mario. We’ve seen cloud-based games that work well (World of Warcraft, anyone?), but it’s a feature that shouldn’t be utilized unless it’s absolutely necessary to the concept of a game. Like every other piece of “hip” technology to come down the pipe, it’s neither inherently good nor evil–it’s all about applying it properly and smartly.

@GamingBOB says: #EA #SimCity DRM philosophy – pay for game. Provide no game at all cost!
I say: Please don’t give them any ideas.

@ValentinGarza says: EA fumbled this launch like Mark Sanchez fumbles a football.#SimCity #EA
I say: Sports analogies! I love those! I can do those!

  • EA threw this one away worse than Chuck Knoblauch trying to hit the first baseman.
  • SimCity is to EA as Jamarcus Russell was to the Oakland Raiders: an expensive mistake no one else would’ve made.
  • Always on? Grady Little thought that about Pedro Martinez, too.
  • SimCity is the Shockmaster.

@homeywankenobi says: @simcity This is FUCKED! Servers are FUCKED up, tutorials FUCKED up, you guys FUCKED this game up! This is the bullshit of all bullshit!
I say: Simcity obviously is not the game you’re looking for, Homey Wan.

@rrmcgrew says: You paid $80 for SimCity and now can’t play? Well I’ll sell you SimServer for $10 and never let you play either! 85% savings!#SimShitty
I say: A bold entrepreneur steps forward to fill a gaping hole in the market! I don’t know about SimServer, but I would play SimShitty. I’ve always wanted to manage my own virtual port-o-potty empire.

@emperorj says: I’m sure SimCity will improve when they implement microtransactions to add the fun parts
I say: I’m surprised they aren’t charging a penny for every tile of pipe.

@rhys_edwards says: SimCity is much like foreplay. You finally get in, drop a few roads and a power plant and the server blows it’s load.
I say: Maybe EA should try to fix its servers with a cock ring.

@iheartOTPHJs says: I want SimCity only because of how #tightbutthole the commercial is.
I say: And this is why game companies can get away with so much of the shit we all hate: uninformed consumers who fall prey to the hype machine and make uninformed purchases. But I’m definitely adding tightbutthole to my daily vocabulary.

@itisinmybum says: Making me so angry I had to change my tampon :( #simcity
I say: Best combination of handle and tweet ever.


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