This Week in Games: Why Do People Keep Talking about Battletoads?

It’s Friday and you’re getting drunk tonight. Now let’s look at some of the gaming news that might have slipped your notice this week!

GROUPON CEO RUNS HIS COMPANY LIKE A NEWB:

Yesterday, Groupon fired their co-founder and CEO Andrew Mason for the simple offense of being shitty. Addressing this in a company-wide email, Mason admitted the reason he was being fired was obvious and then went on to say something that confused the hell out of most of his staff:

“I’m OK with having failed at this part of the journey. If Groupon was Battletoads, it would be like I made it all the way to the Terra Tubes without dying on my first ever play through.”

The difference of course being that when you died in Battletoads (and you always died in Battletoads), you hit the continue button. When you run a multi-million dollar company into the ground, it’s more like an actual game over for your career.

But you and I and his pot smoking interns got his reference and I guess that’s what matters.

OUYA IS ACTUALLY SHIPPING:

This highlights the major difference between Kickstarter video game projects. On one end you have an array of developers: some who made classics and not much since then, some established game makers, some who are new to game development–all of whom are disorganized. On the other end you’ve got corporations and business people–they’re usually manufacturing something, not generating content.

I can’t believe I’m about to say it, but this is why you go with the businessmen (and women): shit gets done.

A’course the thing could ship and be totally shitty so scratch everything I just said.

THINGS ARE STILL BEING RELEASED ON WIIWARE:

Remember that shitty Wiiware service that you used once on your Nintendo Wii before the novelty instantly vanished? Something was actually released through it this week. Even though Retro City Rampage developer Vblank Entertainment went on record to say that they’d seen the most success on the PS Network, it didn’t stop them from releasing a Wiiware version of their game yesterday.

It’s sort of like if Ben Affleck released Argo on Laserdisc.

Was this senseless act a cry for help? Probably not, but it certainly was senseless.

THIS ASSASSIN LOOKS LIKE ALL THE OTHERS:

Assassin’s Creed IV was announced and, you guessed it, it’s about a KKK member using hidden weaponry and parkour to murder people. When I first saw the press release I thought it was DLC content or something. Nope, just the same assassin outfit in a different time and place. I think one of these killers should take a home-ec or fashion class or something. What’s wrong with throwin’ a little blue or red on that getup?

UPDATE: This one has a gun. The last one had a hatchet but this one has a gun–that’s the distinction.

MORE NON-PLAYSTATION CHARACTERS BECOMING ALL-STARS:

I don’t know anyone that’s played Playstation All-Stars, but  here’s some news for those of you who have: Isaac Clarke (of Dead Space fame) and some Greek myth are going to be playable. I don’t know why Isaac is a Playstation all-star; I mean, no Dead Space game has ever been exclusive to the system.

But I guess God Of War can only take you so far.


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