Articles related to Reviews


Comstock on Bioshock:Infinite

The Luteces showed me how to control an electrical universe with their machine, the same one that brought them to the year 2013 where, they said, there were special shops that sold universes inside boxes. You put a plate inside a metal box and then add some wires to a projector that lets you see what you’re controlling.  I’m glad to report that the people of the future are endearing to the city of Columbia, and put it in a box labeled Bioshock: Infinite. I didn’t have any pressing matters of jingoism to get to so I sat down to manipulate Columbia for a while. It turns out the guy on the box is the False Shephard so let me describe this guy to you: white. All the more reason to stay alert folks as he could be among you! But seriously, nah, the False...

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Doom 3 BFG Edition Review

Doom 3 BFG Edition is a stunning achievement that is visually inspiring and yet frightfully terrifying. Fans of this series will welcome their latest trip to Hell and back and newcomers will experience a place built for blood, fear, and death. If your one of those people into expensive bathtubs and things covered in glitter then maybe this carnage isn't for you, otherwise we've got you covered!...

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Fable 3 Review

Gerardo Suarez reviews Fable 3 for you, he breaks down the game play, the weapons, the characters and everything in between. If you loved the first two in the series, you should run out now and get this one!...

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Retro City Rampage Review

Retro City Rampage Review Retro City Rampage (“RCR”) is fucking fantastic. Imagine a cross between the irreverent humor of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and Grand Theft Auto 2, set in a pixelated 8-bit universe. That’s what RCR is. During your trek through Theftopolois circa 1985 you’ll meet caricatures of Bill and Ted, Doc Brown, Mega Man, and Solid Snake–all within the first fifteen minutes of gameplay. You’ll face off against classic 8-bit icons like Contra’s burly protagonists and Bionic Commando (“BionicCop”). Parody isn’t limited to video game references, either; all of pop culture is fair game. RCR is basically the past 30 years condensed into an isometric (and pixelated) perspective. The missions range from infiltrating a base to get a faux flux capacitor to arming bombs in an underwater Mario Bros. (or TMNT) parody. Or you can basically cause wanton destruction in lieu of completing the missions. The...

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The Ball Review

The Ball from Teotl Studios here is a first person puzzle game that takes inspiration from Portal. The player is an archaeologist exploring what is assumed to be Mexico who falls into a giant ditch. It just so happens that your colleagues can’t rescue you anytime soon, so they suggest you do some exploring. Not long after, you find what I guess you could call a ball gun, because it controls a giant ball. You can attach the ball to your gun and roll it around, or hit it with a hammer mechanism that sends the ball off at decent speeds. Along the way, you have to solve puzzles and open doors, unlocking an ancient civilization, along with a zombie gorilla and a giant zombie bird that shits giant exploding eggs at you. Overall, the game mechanics are well done. At no point did I find...

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Bombing the Bowl with iOS: Surviving High School

If you’re like me (male, late 20’s, borderline alcoholic, eat too much yogurt), you spend a lot of time on the throne. Unfortunately, there isn’t always a magazine handy, especially in the cramped, oh-God-why-is-the-seat-so-warm confines of an office stall, but that’s why Steve Jobs invented the iPhone. It’s been scientifically proven that iOS games are only fun to play on the shitter. Don’t listen to those holdouts that claim Apple’s mobile offerings are good fodder for the subway or your daughter’s boring dance recital; such uncouth pseudoscience is the realm of quacks and charlatans. It has no place in the modern world of logic and reason. And so, in the interest of helping all of our readers keep themselves entertained while launching the ol’ butt shuttle, I’d like to recommend an iOS game that’s about as enjoyable as 99 cent phone games can possibly be. Surviving...

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